Contemplative

Sometimes I wonder what the use is in some things. I mean take school for example. I see the point in having my doctor going to medical school and my attorney going to law school. [I don't however, see the point in having him take the LSAT, but whatever that's another story.] Sometimes I feel as if the whole thing is entirely futile. Most of the time, all I'm doing is jumping through a bunch of hoops to make some random human being happy. I haven't learned anything sometimes I think, other than how to do menial tasks whilst pertending they are important. And then, we are back to the beginning aren't we? We're back to realizing what the whole point of education isn't education, it's socialization.

The question I think that I have to ask myself is why? Why do I do this to myself? Why do I stay up late at night and push myself to the limits? All so that I can push myself to the limitz later? I don't understand why I must push and push and push to earn the right to push and push more. Then, I'll push myself way past 9-5 to pay back "The Man" for the right to push and push myself. Meanwhile my friends and collegues around me will drink themselves into a stupor and their livers into comas while others will use the determination they've learned to resolve to throw themselves off a ledge somewhere. And meanwhile the rest of my friends will work themselves into lonliness even further still - and their families will not be there because those families got left behind in the dust behind tax credits and overtime. Why?

Because all I have to do is play the game to earn the right to set myself and others free.