Work

I went to work again yesterday, at the Mission, and everytime I go I am always prepared for my heart to be broken - and everytime I drive home I cry because it was.

When I got there yesterday, I was faced with a number of things all on one day that were difficult for me. In an effort to avoid ethical dilemas, I will skip the details of each case, and just present the questions with which I was faced yesterday:

1) Can I, in good faith, expunge the criminal record of an adult who's offenses included Driving While Intoxicated and Vehicular Assault?

2) What can I do for a man the system has ignored? What can I do to help the immigrant who is perhaps being extorted by law enforcement - who's lost his job and has no food and is desperate because someone somewhere lost a sheet of paper and is waiting for the replacement to come in triplicate? Why don't legal ethics permit me to help him? How can I be satisfied with my work if I have to watch him walk out the door still starving?

3) WHy am I so tired - why are all my compatriots so tired but we haven't made a dent??? Why is it that despite all the grand efforts of hundreds who came beore me, that still when I drive home from work, there are tents on every available space and childen without shoes??? Why does downtown LA still look like a refugee camp? And why do I have Dr. Pepper in my fridge for extra caloric intake while they are starving??? And perhaps more importantly - why do many codes of legal ethics, including The ABA Model Code, PRECLUDE me from helping them??? Why can't I feed them - why can I ONLY help them with tickets or visitation rights but cannot assist them in surviving?

While I was serving dinner down in the cafe after finishing my work at the clinic, an old woman shook her cain at me, insulted me and told me that it was "just an accident my oreo [butt] was on that side of the chains" and I didn't know what I could say. Maybe it's not an accident, maybe it is. Either way - she's still hungry and I just ate a banana.